there are so many things I would love to ask you, and many, MANY more things that I NEED to ask you. Looking back I always feel so foolish for not appreciating the time we had together, I try to tell myself that I was just young and dumb but it's no excuse. I wish I could have had you teach me everything you know, you were always SO smart about everything. I remember asking you so many questions as a kid and always being amazed that you always knew the perfect answer or the perfect solution. I wish I could have learned everything you knew about woodworking and cabinet making, I would love to follow in your footsteps and refinish and restore antiques, and make high quality antique reproductions. You knew so much about everything and I always remember watching documentaries with you about Titanic as a kid. My most prized possession is the model Titanic you made me for my 6th or 7th birthday, it is so beautiful and detailed and made so well. I love it so much and I love YOU so much. You always did so much for me thinking back, like when I wanted the square grand piano to be set up and you actually got it out and set it up for me, which I remember was NOT an easy task...at ALL. Or the time you helped me bring that beautiful pump organ home. You were ALWAYS there for me so much and I just want you to know how much I appreciate everything. I love you so much and I miss you so terribly. Pepper has recently passed away and the family and I are all so heartbroken. To someone who doesn't know it would seem like he was just a pet, but he was not. He was SO much more, me and Ana and Mom all believe that he could really sense your presence. Many times me and mom or Ana and me would be sitting talking about you or thinking about you and he would just start up singing all happy. And anyone who knew Pepper knows that he did NOT sing unless he had a reason to. And the type of singing I'm referring to was different than any other type of singing he used to do. Now that he's gone too it just feels so sad in the house. He was our special connection to you and now we lost him as well. Whenever I would go out to visit him I would always sense your presence when I talked to him. Now he is gone. You and him are two things that will always remind me of my childhood. I love you so much Dad and I miss you more than I could ever fully express. The sadness and pain never fades but only grows as I come to realize all that I lost with your passing. Thank you and Mom(and Pepper) for making my childhood the best a kid could ever ask for, or dream of.
Love always, Benjamin.
